Concrete Bends. Why don't you?

I remember exactly when I learned that concrete bends. It's porous too, but I can't make a neat analogy to the human condition with that.

I was in Building Materials 2 at Texas A&M and we were going over the properties of concrete. Our professor told us how the concrete beams that hold up highway fly-overs are shipped to the site with a camber. In other words they have a shallow curve to them. This is so that when put in place and loaded with cars etc. they bend and appear straight rather than sagging in the middle. One of my friends in the class stopped the instructor and asked him if he just said concrete bends. He said yes. Blew our minds.

The material that we all take as solid, permanent and impregnable bends.

The larger concept in play here is rigid things break. This can be seen in many aspects of building construction. Skyscrapers are another example I really like. They sway in the wind. If they were designed to be completely stiff they would catastrophically fail. Rigid things break.

It is our expectations of how life should be that cause us the most pain. Undoubtedly life will not go the way we plan. We may not find the right woman until we're in our late 20s. The degree we got in college may turn out to not be the one we really need to pursue our passion. If we cling to our expectations of how life should be all we will do is suffer.

Instead we should remember that rigid things break and stay flexible. Be happy we found the right woman and have two kids instead of four. Take night courses to get the degree we need to pursue the career we really want. The more fluid our thinking the easier it will be to accept things the way they are and reset so we can continue toward our goals.

I'm not saying we should be soft and pliable. Going whichever way the wind blows. Instead be like a skyscraper. Sway with the wind and then come back to center. 

This Moment

I wanted to expand on a throw away line I used to end “The RightTime” a few weeks ago.

“Be in the moment. After all this moment is the only thing that is real.”

Its a good line. Seems pretty deep. Makes me sound like a thinker and stuff, but what do I really mean. What I don't mean is live life to the fullest because tomorrow you might die. I do not like that cliché and covered it in “Some Words of Wisdom From Steve Jobs.”

My point is that now is the only time that is real. The past is just a memory and the future is an illusion. This exact moment in time is the only thing that is real. Not the beginning of this blog or the end. Just right now. This sentence is the only thing that is real. Now that sentence is not real. It is the past and this one is real.

Now nobody pull the quantum mechanics card on me. I'm not talking about possibilities I'm talking about how human beings actually experience time. Linearly and forward. What does this all mean? Not much, but maybe it helps us understand the human experience just a little better.  

This Is Not the Stereotype You Are Looking For

I don't have anything against stereotypes. They are simply how our brains are wired. Without stereotypes we would not be able to function in the world. Our brain would be overloaded with new information every second of every day and all we would be able to do is process that information. The problem with stereotypes comes when you are presented with information that varies from the stereotype and you do not adjust your model of that person or thing to account for it. All that being said this blog is really about a stereotype that has been applied to me that I find rather funny.

The set up for this is that I am really good at taking care of kids. I have a combination of patients, mental and physical strength and love for children that makes it fairly easy for me. I'm by no means perfect but it's definitely a talent I have. Kay will tell you that I am better at taking care of the kids than her. Which is what makes this stereotype all the funnier.

Whenever I am out with both kids all by myself it is not uncommon for someone, usually a lady and older than me, to look at me and say, "got your hands full today?"

No one ever has ever said that to Kay when she is out with both kids.

Bill Page busting stereotypes!

Am I a Christian?

On a good day I get up in the morning before the kids do and take a few minutes for myself. I write, read or just have some coffee. At six A.M. it's go time. Feed the dogs. Get Mackenzie up, dressed and eating. Shower and get dressed. Get Grayson up dressed and eating. Leave to take Mackenzie to daycare as close to seven as I can.

On the hour plus drive to daycare and work I either listen to music or a podcast. I work seven to eight hours. Sometimes I stop for lunch. Sometimes I don't. I pick up Grayson on my way home. Another hour of music or podcasts. Kay gets home with Mackenzie around six and we launch right into the nightly routine of supper, baths, books and bed. If all goes well both kids are asleep by 9:30 P.M.

We watch some TV or clean the house. Either way I go to bed way too late for how early I get up. Rinse, repeat and do it all again the next morning.

So where is the Christian in there?

I went from being a hopelessly lost atheist fighting for my share of the limited resources of Earth to having a personnel relationship with my creator who calls me to love my neighbor as myself. Shouldn't my life have changed some? What is different about me from the next lower middle class white guy? The problem is I was a pretty good person before I became a Christian and I'm a fairly good person now. Jesus didn't have to bring me out of a world of vile self destructive behavior. So outwardly I look pretty much the same.

If I am being honest the fact is I have not been transformed. Certainly the spring point for all my actions has changed, but I cannot say I have worked every day of the last seven years to be more like Christ. It is a mistake to think that my conversion experience was the end. It was the beginning, and now the hard work has to be done.