My Mom Thinks I’m Lazy

(Hi Mom, I love you) The other day my Mom said I could work hard and focus when I want to, but otherwise I’m lazy. She’s right the fact is I just don’t get things done. Examples? The garage. The shelves Dad and I built for Mackenzie’s room are still not painted. The kitchen is not organized to my liking. Photo albums of Mack are not made. I could go on and on. Pretty easy to see what Mom said is related to some of my most recent blogs.

From the outside looking in I can see why someone would think that I’m lazy, but I think it is more complicated than that. To start with the definition of lazy from dictionary.com is, “Averse or disinclined to work, activity, or exertion.” That isn’t me at all. All I do is work. I’m always moving, doing, straightening, cleaning, writing, playing w/ Mack or reading. The only time I rest is when I’m sleeping. I don’t even watch that much TV. I do play on the Internet and Facebook a lot though, but that is still doing something.

Maybe it’s a question of focus not effort. Outside of work I do not stay on task, and you could make an argument that I don’t at work either. I am bouncing around almost constantly. Touching this or that task/project only briefly and moving on to the next before any one is complete. Leaving a million different things half finished, barely started or still in conception in my wake.

The other half of this question is when something has to be done. I am an obsessed terror that cannot let it go for even a moment. I’ll work day and night nonstop. This has become a very rare condition in recent years. The problem is it has to be a real deadline. I can’t fake it. If I know it’s an arbitrary deadline I will work hard but it will not trigger my obsession. So most likely I will not finish on time. I’ll get closer though than if I had not set the deadline. So recently I have been trying this technique to some success. The garage is moving closer to clean. Of course I have a real deadline there as well as some arbitrary internal ones. The truck is coming November 7th.